Friday Online Diary Entries: “Confrontation with anxiety” – Story Based

Mental Health: At last we see each other plain Monsieur le Maire you’ll wear a different chain I’m going control your head and all of your body making you feel useless unpowered. I’m not going to let you defeat me again. You will not win this war that we have continually.

Kitty Johnson: Before you say another word mental health before you chain me up like a slave again. Listen to me there is something I must do. This life that I want to change I don’t want to suffer anymore or the love ones around me. There is none me who can intercede in mercy’s nam give me three days that’s all I need; I promise to you I will return I pledge my word, I will return.

Mental Health: You must think of me as mad! I’ve haunted you across people like you will never change; you are weak, no one cares about you. People like you can never change believe me what you will.

Kitty Johnson: There is a duty that I’m sworn to do because you know nothing of my life all I did was to fall in love. I’m a stronger person by far and the price I had to pay I’m warning you mental health dare you talk to me of the crime there is power in me yet my race is not over yet.

Mental Health: No you’re number to me is 24601 because my duty to the law of mental health you have no rights; you hade nothing of the world come with me 24601 I haven’t finished with you yet now that the wheel has turned around but not before I see this justice to be done. Kitty Johnson means nothing now.

Kitty Johnson: You know nothing off me mental health! I was born in a good family I wasn’t born a scum like you. I am from a good family.

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Thursday Online Diary Entries: “Tell me you love me” – Story Based

Oh no! here we go again fighting over what I said and done “I’m sorry” I’m sorry that I’m bad at this love hang on I’m not good at this but I can’t say I’m innocent not even hardly but I’m sorry. All my friends they know it’s true but I don’t know who I a, without you but I’ve got it bad baby.
Please tell me that you love me as I need someone on days like this when I need you so bad; just to protect me, hold me and everything. Days like this I need you more than anything in the world because you’re  not a nobody to me your my somebody; my somebody that I love very much to the point that I don’t see the day that you move on and be happy without me, I don’t know what I’m living for if I’m living without you.
Everything that I need is standing in front of me I know we will be alright through the ups and downs because I’m going to stick around we can promise that we will be alright. I know our love is like a battlefield no matter how much we have to fight because I know that I have you standing in front of me telling me that everything will be alright.

Wednesday Online Diary Entries: “I see the light” – Story Based

All those days watching from the windows like all those years outside looking in; all that time never even knowing just how blind that I’ve been, now that I am here blinking in the starlight now that I’m here suddenly I see standing here it’s all so clear. Knowingly I’m where I’m meant to be like at last I’ve seen the light like it had been lifted; at last I see the light like the sky is new bringing in the warm, the real and the brightness but the world has somehow shifted. All at once everything looks different now that I see you in my world you are my prince of my life.
All those days chasing down a daydream all those years living in a blur but at the time; they were never truly seeing things as they were but now she’s here shining in the starlight she’s here suddenly I know that it’s crystal clear where I meant to go, and at last I see he light like the fog of pain has been lifted knowing that she’s been protecting me.
At last we see the light like the sky is new with the warmth, real and bright like the world has somehow shifted all at once everything is different now that we can see each other. I know that we will be together one day soon.

Tuesday Online Diary Entries: “Friends” – Story Based

You say you love me I say that your crazy because we’re nothing more than friends I don’t see you as my lover more like a brother; I known you since we were like 10, yeah I know right so don’t mess this up by talking that shit about us. It’s only going to push me away; that’s it I’ve had it here we go again you saying you love me the thing is you’re making me crazy, don’t go look at me with that look in your eye. You know that look that you’re not going get away without a fight.

You can’t be reasoned with I’m so done with being polite I’ve told you thousand of times; haven’t I made it obvious? Haven’t I made it clear? Do you want me spell it out too you? F-R-I-E-N-D-S have you got no shame of course not because you look insane turning up at my door at 2am in the morning the rain pouring with attempt of flowers; I begin to think haven’t we been here before?, oh please don’t mess this up by talking about that shit it’s only going to push me away and that will end everything.

Here we go again don’t give me that look where you’re not going to get away with it without me punching you; as I know you can’t reasoned with even I tried for a long time, I just go along with it because I’m so done with being polite and I’ve made it obvious? Haven’t I made it clear? F-R-I-E-N-D-S that’s how you spell the fucking word! Get that shit inside your head we are just friends.
Ahhh we are just FRIENDS!

Saturday Online Diary Entries: “Broken hearted girl” – Story Based

You were my everything that I thought you never were and nothing like I thought you could have ever been but yet no matter how much you hurt me you still live inside of me. So tell me how you still get my hopes up but never do?
You’re the only one I wish I could forget to the only one I love to not forgive but it’s too late that you’re the only one that can get me through the hard times even when I hate you. You know I can’t erase you but the times that you hurt me and out tears on my face even now while I still hate you; it’s pains me to say that I know that I’ll be there at the end of the day, I don’t want to be without you and I don’t want a broken heart and I don’t want to take a breath without you.
I know that I love you but l to me just say I don’t want to love you in no other kind of way; I don’t want a broken heart anymore I don’t want to play the broken hearted girl anymore, I know I’m not the broken hearted girl and there’s something that I feel I need to say it but up until now I’ve always been afraid that you would never come around and still I want to put this out.
You say that you’ve got the most respect for me but sometimes I feel you’re not deserving of me yet you’re still in my heart you’re the only one for me. I don’t complain because I’m afraid of that you would walk away but now I don’t hate you. Yes, there are times when I hate you because you make me feel unhappy but right now I just want to be happy to say that I will be there at the end of the day.
I don’t want to be without you. I don’t want a broken heart I really don’t want to take another breath without you; I’m scared alone I don’t know what else to do I’m frightened, I don’t want to play that part because I know that I love you but let me just say I don’t want to love you in no other way. I don’t want a broken heart and I don’t want to play the broken hearted girl.
Now that I’m at a place that I thought I’d never be because I’m living in a world that it’s all about you and me because I’m not going to be afraid as my broken heart is free. I’m ready to spread my wings and fly away. I don’t want to be a broken hearted girl anymore.

Friday Online Diary Entries: “Don’t call this love” – Story Based

Cry in the rain with nothing to say but lately I wonder who you are today why I know all about you however I don’t understand why you won’t save me like you promised me why did things have to change? Oh baby something is going on yet god knows I know you have another agenda yet you can’t keep nothing from me because I know hat I’ve seen now; you can try you’re best to deceive me but I know where you’ve been now, and yet you cry out to me but it’s hard to believe so don’t call this love. I might be no good.
In your eyes only one day you’ll see this I was good for you honey; you need to grow up get your life together as right now we can’t go on now doing this to each other, baby what’s going on I know something is going on. God knows you know. You know you can’t keep nothing from me now because I know what I’ve seen now you try you’re hardest to deceive me I know where you been now and I cry my heart out with the pain.
It’s hard to believe that I don’t call this love listen to me now baby I’ve said to you don’t call this love. You know that you can’t keep your promises other than hurt me more; yet you say that I’m like the ex but you know that I’m not but I keep on putting up with it, until I forgive you more and more making you think that it’s okay to continue doing it but then you can’t keep your word but don’t like it when I cry out in pain. This is because I have had a lot worse damage than you and you keep on doing it. If you want me to love you once more you got to fix my heart and the pain that you done. I’ve already lost the love that I love the most and you’re already heading the same direction.


Thursday Online Diary Entries: “Meet me half way” – Story Based

I can’t go further than this I just want oh so badly it’s my biggest wish. I spend my time just thinking about you every single day yes really because I’m really missing missing you. All of those things that we used to do just me and you. Can you meet me half way right on the borderline that’s where I am going to wait for you because I’ll be looking out every night and day: take my heart to the limit, and this where I’m going to stay. I can’t go further than this due my heart wrapped in chains I want you so bad it’s my only wish.
You tell me you travel the world and even sailed the sevens seas that laid across universe to visit the other galaxies; you tell me to tell you where to go so you can meet me there, as you can navigate yourself to where I am and girl I want to be you right now.
You travel up the town and down the town trying to find me because you like to have me around like every single day as you love me always. So I’ll meet you halfway right on the borderline like I told you before if you ever listened to me; as you walked a crossed the bridge to the other side, you found me like it was only just you and I in a film scene and no one around. You wrapped you’re arms around me not letting me go. You said to me you’ll fly in the skies for me and you. I will die until I die for me and you.
Meet me half way right on the borderline that’s where I’m going to be waiting for you I’ll be looking out every night and day; taking my heart to the limit and this is where I’ll stay for you to come and rescue me, as I can’t go any further than this I want only so bad it’s my only wish. Yet you came and break these chains of my heart.

Saturdays Online Diary Entries: “Pushing your limits everyday” – Story Based

I find that if we always push our limits to the the limit each we will make ourselves so much better in life than staying in the same life and same spot not challenging ourselves. If we push ourselves to the limit we know that we can and also know that we are in it to win it. I soon realise that my heart was in the right place to carry on now I know that it’s time to finish off what I started; I don’t have have to worry what other people will say because it’s who I am and got to live my own dream my way. We just got to ignore people who don’t want to work harder or want to take it further than where they are now.

I know that I’ve got to work harder and take it further because there’s nothing holding me back we got to do it right now. To make it even better by working together it’s now or never; I’ve just got to believe in myself also you got to believe in yourself as we got to shine our way through because we’ve got to push it to the the limit as we are in it to win it and you know that’s true.

So why not turn it up because that’s the only way we can do it now there’s no time to stop as we are the champions in this world and life. We can be winners everyday that’s how we understand our destiny is right there in our hands as we work harder and further like there’s nothing holding us back.

If we work together we can reach for the skies to be even better it’s either now or never let’s show them how we fly when we push our limits…



Wednesday Online Diary Entries: “Born this way” – Story Based in light of special needs children.

It doesn’t matter if you love me more than capital radio just put your paws up because I were born this way. My mum told me when I was young and everyday we are all born superstars as she rolled my hair and put my lipstick on in the glass of her mirror. “There’s nothing wrong with loving who you are” she said “because god made you perfect hun” “so hold your head up and you’ll go far, listen to me when I say”
I’m just beautiful in my own way because god doesn’t make no mistakes as I’m on the right track in my life; I was born this way for a reason I plead you don’t hide yourself in regret love yourself, and you’re set to be on the right track. You were born this way. There is any other way to keep me away from being outside from the world because I was born this way.
People who are normal don’t be a drag like you use to be let me and everyone else just be a queen or a king like everyone else. Help us being who we are than being judged I just want to give myself prudence and love my friends. Haven’t you noticed that the subway kids rejoice our truth; yet some religions are insecure but I must be myself and respect my youth, a being a different child is not a sin then believe in Capital Special Needs child. I love my life I love this record because it makes me happy and love needs faith.
Don’t be one of those drags back in the old days who don’t care or liked who we were because they couldn’t understand us back then. Whether you’re broke or evergreen? Wether we are black, white, beige or chola descent no matter what background we are from our disabilities don’t really let us define us but you still let us be outcast, bullied and teased. Just remember we rejoice and love ourselves because we are born this way.
No matter how I beautiful I am but I know that god hasn’t made a mistake because I’m on the right track as I was born this way as it’s in my DNA to be born this way to be different.

Tuesday Online Diary Entries: “Stargazing” – Story Based

Sitting in the campsite that I’m staying picturing the life before I knew you; it was okay, alright and it was what it was. I’ll paint my life in the sky before I loved you. There were never pictures in the hallway, no fireworks, no grand allure but the reason it only happens was that you came through my door.
Oh now my life feels more than just amazing to which I’m your eyes it makes me feel like I’m stargazing in the world of truly forgotten. It’s like living in a movie to which I’m Fred Astaire Singing in the rain; to where I’m finding myself seeing fireworks the whole grand allure, this is because it’s every time that you walk through my door.
Life feels more than just amazing in your eyes as I’ve been stargazing up close and personal but yet there’s no fireworks or no grand allure because that only happens when you come through my door. As I’m coming back to reality to where I’m finding myself under a blanket outside and I soon realise that I’m just stargazing.