So I’ve basically just pulled a all nighter; can’t sleep, can’t breathe, too cold and yet I’m too warm.
It’s all about the heads in the cloud; don’t think this is your fault, that I can’t sleep because I’m trying to rescue you from your ivory tower. Your walls are full of magic; if this is true, I’m coming for you as I’m coming to tackle your nightmares because I’m here to protect you from them. You don’t have to be scared no more.
This might be crazy what I’m going to say, with the air that will take us away. If the happiness is the truth; but it comes with bad news talking about this and that, just clap along if you know if the happiness is too you. You can’t bring me down because your love is too high; if there’s no room without a roof, you know what that is. As the love is too high!
Even though we are building by boring brick; yet we both know we hate this part, I thought we are stronger than this. I hate this part right here. Everyday of every scene; we telling each other whats hurting us, from being so apart. I know you hate this part right here. I know you will ask me to hold on for a bit longer; I will ask you the same, I’m not going to leave you no matter what.
We can walk like a champion as we are young and free; somewhere you hold yourself, walk like a champion talk like a champion. We got nothing to loose because we’ve got two things on our side; we have each other’s love, we got one most important thing. We’ve got one special lady keeping us together; nobody does it better than she does, I know that she would want us to fight the system. With all of the crazy things we are trying to do; I know that I cant go back to the way it was, I don’t think you want to go back to the way it was.
With the room that has no roof on. We are giants. When I look into your eyes and when you look into my eyes. Its just you and I. There are giants across the water; I could see someone sitting on one of the giants, we are giants in our hearts. As we build by boring brick; not just any building by boring brick, we are building the love into people’s lives. I whisper into your ear. I can’t shake this feeling off. That’s what they don’t know because I’m building with the love boring bricks with you; because I’m not shaking it off, I know who’s not shaking it off. Have a look over where the giants are.
I light up the sky above you; I’m not going to fade away from you, because you and me will be standing right by side of each other. I’m not leaving you no matter; I’m going to fight this, we are going to rule the world as the stars are coming out tonight. They are lighting the sky tonight just for you; as I’m staying by your side as the sky is being lit up, by the stars for you. For you.
Rumour has it, rumour has it, I didn’t stay up all night to get all this done. Rumour has it, rumour has it, you have made my heart melt with your loving and smile. Along with the frown that I keep on telling you to stop doing that; because that I had said it, I didn’t really meant it. Rumour has it, rumour has it, that theres a whisper in the wind with the words with your name on it.
I love you; as my heart burst again, just thinking of you and seeing you on my screen. Seeing your face light up; making me feel proud of you, with the smile on your face. You may have my number; you may have my name, but you can have my heart more than ever. You go where I go. I go where you go. Would you see what I see. Your loving eyes melts my worries as my loving eyes melts all of your worries. As we standing tall together and let the skyfall around us.
Wanting to do something good with your life; there’s lots of things that you could do in your spare time, loads of official charities out there that you can help.
The worst feeling is that your not 100 percent sure in what you want to do with your life; better still your waiting for prince or princess charming to come and get you, so that you don’t have to go to work or do anything. Have that luxury life that everyone else has; think about the children, the poor, the needy and the helpless. You may have a home to go to; family that care for you, still have loads of opportunities to give a try. What do the people who are in need have? Think about it whilst your reading this.
Over the years I have helped with charities such like Children In Need a well known charity in England; my local charity called Challengers, and last but least a special needs school who has become academy trust within a year called Pond Meadow which is a local school in my hometown. When I was growing up I had lots of big aspirations; meaning there was lots of things that I wanted to do, but no one really believed in me.
Well the teachers at school because I was in the bottom two sets; so they didn’t really care much about me and my grades, however since I’ve left school I still didn’t know what I wanted to do. First college didn’t really believe in me either; so I gave up trying my hardest to do that course, that was when I went to another college and that college helped me to turn my life around.
They helped me to believe in myself; along side them believe in me, I managed to work hard to get good grades, help me to focus on my creativity. You’re probably thinking why has this got anything to do with charities and helping people. I can tell you right now; it has everything to do with charities because if I believed in myself to do things when no one else would, I wouldn’t be doing what I am doing now.
Working with special needs children I provided them hope, encourage them, do things that they thought it would be impossible to do. They were being giving the life that everyone else had; believe me the things that I have witnessed, helped and made them do lots of progress. It made their day and your day one hundred percent good one even if there was things that couldn’t be helped.
All I am saying is that if your struggling to know what you wanting to do in life after school or college; why not become a volunteer or a place that you become a paid volunteer, to gain some work experience and also give you some sort of direction in where you want to go in life.
Here are some few ideas you may want to check out:
- Local Charities
- Children in Need
- Sports Relief
- Comic Relief/Red Nose Day
- National Trust
- English Heritage
- Helping children in Africa
Remember me talking about my best friend Caspian; well he had asked me to help with one of his charities, to which I manage to scrape some money together out of my own pocket. Sent it to a country in Africa called Nigeria; I had received some photos, from the person who was on Caspian’s team through him of course and in the pictures they had shown me what they had received. I do have to say is that I am so pleased that they have got something that they truly enjoy the most. To also have a childhood that like everyone else.
Do something to make will make yourself proud and seeing other people smile as they are being heard and listen to. Its that feeling of great sense of feeling to have when you have made someone’s day.
The point of sleeping is that you were meant to be asleep but due to the heat I was up very early indeed; so I thought hey let’s get most of my blogs done or get some of them started so that by the time it’s gets so hot, I can stop and chill until its cool enough to do more. Let’s see how that plans out shall we.
Everyone has fears and self doubts but people who say they don’t are calling themselves liars; no one is perfect, everyone has fears and doubts about things. If people saying to I don’t have any fears or any doubts; don’t believe them unless they can prove it to you that aren’t, if otherwise they are lying to you. They are just big headed people; who are just so up themselves that, they don’t care about anyone else but themselves.
With me when my fears and self doubts kick in I beat myself self up for a few days; not quite like that but oh you know what I mean, jeez guys come on you know me. Can I just explain what I mean about how I conquer my fears and self doubts please? Thank you. I’ll give you a couple of my fears and self doubts as examples to help you picture it more clearly than a plain written texts sitting right in front of you; to which isn’t fun what so ever, other than someone like me telling you to just get over it. I’m not that sort of a person; I’ll guide you in the way it is a positive direction, so that when you take on theses challenges you can say I did that because someone believed in me and I believed in myself to do so. Yeah I believe in everyone who puts their mind to it.
Okay for me my main massive fear is heights. Heights are like the most deadliest fear of mine in the world; you may think I’m going over the top with this, I wish I was but I’m not honest because I can’t bare the thought of something being so high and you have to climb it. Yet I push myself to do it as much as I can but when the time is right; all I have to do is I can’t do it anymore, there are times that I can do so many but when I know that I’ve put myself through enough I would break down crying because I know I’ve done what I can. This is whole height business is never going; even if you paid me I wouldn’t do it because I will not just get over it in any hurry, I can promise you that.
But however I can say is that if you are determined to do something that you have a fear off; go and do it be brave, don’t let anyone tell you that you can’t do it or tell yourself that you can’t do it. That’s called self doubting yourself in the long run; to which I do a lot but I can conquer things like that, where as soon as a fear starts to come in weather it’s a job interview, my writing isn’t good enough or anything that I might endure as a fear and then come out of it to think “oh I don’t think that went well” or “my writing isn’t good enough” but yet at the end of the day you get the job and your writing is really good look how many views you’ve got already.
By realising that your in that flight and fright mood; your thinking what the hell was that about, nothing good really happens to me?, have they got the right person who is this person that they wanted to see and read about? All you have to do is believe this you can do it no matter whatever throws at you.
I have to say today let’s scrap the introduction for this week as I just want to do it all in one this week; as I have a massive announcement but the title gives it away, quite a lot though. However also it might even given you the surprise of that I was actually baptised; yes I don’t believe in it all but my godparents are there for their uses at times, especially one that you don’t see as much.
The last time I saw my godmother was about 2008; at that time it was still awarkard but it was nice to be able to spend of time with her with the family, 9 years later my godmother and her husband now adoptive godfather came back over from all the way from Australia as they’ve moved over there 18 years ago. When they came over my godfather was nagging me everyday since they arrived back been nagging me to come to their get together of old familiar faces that knew them on 26th May 2017, on which I did actually go to it was actually quite special even more special that being with but also I was lot closer to my great gran as it was her house to begin all those years ago.
I had fun memories of going round there every day; sitting, playing and being with her up until she passed away, I think she might of passed away when I was about 3/4 years old before my sister was born. My sister and cousin never really got to meet her as they were born later in the 90’s; however the house went to two good people over the years, where they looked after it well and most of all I could go round there anytime I wanted because I know the people who are currently in the house. It went from my great nan’s house to my godparents to lovely people who I grew up to know through the church that I went to personally but I don’t believe in it. However I believe having both sets of godparents; it’s nice to have the balance of views, more to go to sort of people. My other set of godparents are my uncle and aunt; I have gone to them over the years but due to the certain stances, it’s been tricky for them well my aunt.
However I am going to miss my godparents; as they have now gone back to Australia, my godfather’s next trick is to get me to come to Australia and visit them. Not too sure how that’s going to happen; as I’ve never been on airplane nore I like heights, so it’s going be difficult for him to convince me to go and visit them. Haha.
Let’s not have an introduction break up! Going to do it all in one today; that’s right I’m breaking up with my long term introduction this week, it’s a long old month and plus it’s the second to last week of a Wednesday. So why not do the all important no introduction what so ever; but also I can’t think of any introductions for the moment in time, might as well get on with it and go straight through the whole thing as all in one.
“We’ve all got both light and dark inside us. We choose to act on. That’s who we really are” – Sirius Black. I 100% agree with this quote because no matter what background you come from; you always choose which route to go down, no one tells you to go down the route you take. Unless you have been influenced by someone but it is your choice to go down it no matter what it is.
There is similar saying “I accept that there is no right or wrong. There are many ways to see the situation.” – Rozine. Everyone does it differently there is no right or wrong answer; or no right or wrong way of doing things, however people think they know best don’t actually know best. It’s how everyone’s brain works differently; it goes to show that if everyone was on the right page, we would get on swimmingly but we need the equal balance in life to do things.
Everyone has something’s that bring you happiness weather it’s big or little; at least you have something to make you smile about, everyday or when you remember the time that it happened at the time.
What brings you happiness? All big and little things.
All little things that bring me happiness is when things are more magical than anything else; from a child’s progress to something most memorable time that I have had, here is a few things that brings me happiness.
A nice summer’s day blue sky, no clouds, warm day and lots of positive around the place.
Being with friends who bring the happiness to ones life; share the most fun positive memories, life long friends can always bring joy to life.
Success in little things that I wanted to achieve and carry on achieving one way or another; shows strength to strength everyday, also to take shape of your life no matter what.
Sorry this one is short but as there’s been four blogs today; might as well keep this one short, wasn’t planning on the other one today but heyho it happens
As I’ve done a I am most proud off blog post; I wanted to share with you my most greatest victory so far in 2017, no matter how hard it was leading up to the event but I did it. I manage to put all the past behind me and be able to move on and enjoy myself.
The greatest victory and blessing is that I managed to break my horrible most damaging demons; last week where I spent two days with an ex-friend of mine who is now my best closest friends, I managed to put all the painful memories that they have caused. Now we can move on; hangout, chill and have fun together like we use to do all those years ago.
Without doing that I wouldn’t of gotten through the pain barriers; let them learn their mistakes, what’s more realising how much they actually hurt me as a best friend. They wanted to make it up to me so badly; so I agreed to let them, they proved me that they can do it. They actually care about me more than I had realised.
Here is to the new future of new friendship and guidance of 2017.
This morning after another bad night sleep along with the whole nightmare; I felt more positive, raring to go and do things that need to be done. This is what my day has been about today.
Let’s kick off this weeks feeling on top of the world
Woke up this morning feeling pretty well; on top form feeling so good about myself, minus being tired but I got through it. I do my morning routine, bathroom things, get dressed plus cream if I need to for my skin, depends what I start with first my hair or my face. My hair was first because I normally clip my hair up for doing my make up; so I put my hair extensions in, let the clip go down plated my hair, I then went on to do my face sometimes I forget the put loose powered over foundation before my concealer on which I did today. It doesn’t matter really what way I do it; as it still works either way to be honest, redo my hair again put hair spray over the top loosely and I was ready by 11:30.
As you can see on the right this is what I was wearing today; looking all spring/summer like chick ready for the vitamin D to come and hit me, on which was actually quite nice breeze but chilly especially in the shade. You can tell how breezy it was by looking at my picture of the left; as I was on my way to sort out things somewhere, it was nice walk there and back like I was in a countryside. To be honest with you my hometown is sort of out in a bit of a countryside as you can see fields, trees and path routes along the rivers to get to them or even by car that’s if you know where to go.
I came back from my little earn; I finished sticking my last tags onto my boards that are red; as I left them to dry I started to pack up the rest of my blog paperwork bits up from the dining room, on which I can make sure that it was all clean and respected. Not making it look like a tip. Finally catching up on this months paperwork; which I can get things ready for the boards, along with the blog goals. It’s just a start. I’m pretty amazed I manage to get it all sorted in a week and catch myself up. That goes to show how much time and effort I put into my blog without realising