Thursday Online Diary Entries: “The Name of the game” – Story Based

I’ve seen you twice in a short time it’s only been a week since we started seeing each other to me it’s seems that every time I’m getting more and more open hearted. I was an impossible case to be with because no one could reach me to help; where my anxiety and depression took the toll of me but I think when I see your face there’s a lot that you can teach me, so I wanna know what the name of the game? As I open up too you does that mean anything to you?

What’s the name of the game? Please temp me because I have to know as I’m a very bashful child that’s beginning to grow. The way you make me talk, the way you make me feel and the way you make me show. The fact that I’m trying to conceal but if I put the trust in you would you let me down? Would you laugh at me if I told you that I care for you and that I said that I love you? Would you feel the same way too? It’s just that I want to know.

I just want to know the name of the game because I have no friends no one to see as I’m never invited but now I’m here talking to you. No wonder I get so excited because of the sound of your voice and the way you see through me; got that feeling you have to give me no choice which means a lot to me, I want to know….oh yes I want to know the name of the game because I was an impossible case does it mean anything to you? But I think I can see it in your face because it means a lot to me. What’s the name of the game? Can you feel it the way I do? I’m a curious child it means a lot to me that you made me your choice.

I just want to know….oh yes I just want to know….

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Everyday Post: That knot in you’re stomach?!

Don’t you just hate that knot in you’re stomach that won’t go away especially when you want to sleep? Yep that’s what happened to me no matter how much you try to relax by doing things that you think will help you relax but as soon as you want to turn in you’re head is like nope sorry I’m going to throw everything at you like you deserve it. To which will tell your stomach to tighten it self like you want to vomit no matter how much you don’t want to but yet you feel like you’re going too.

Whatever it is that’s causing me to feel like this can go and do one because it’s already disrupted my day as it always has. The day before I mean and the past week so it needs to stop. Along with my hair needs to stop being a pain in the arse as well along with making scab wounds on top where I’ve been scratching my head too much because it’s been so itching due to dandruff. I genuinely think I’m having late 20’s crisis here guys don’t even know what’s going on.

So this morning I woke up at 5:15am my own occurred (not sure if this is the right word or the correct spelling) cord? Oh wait found the right word that I’m looking for. Scratch that occurred and replace it with accord. Let me start this paragraph again. So this morning I woke up at 5:15am on my own accord without any disruptions what so ever but yet I needed to pee….sorry too much information on that front.

The stomach knot has now gone for now whatever that was but all well just hope I don’t have to feel it ever again. I wonder how that could be possible to be honest if the stomach can turn itself into knots does anyone know? Along with the butterflies in the stomach when your excited but anxious and nervous about something?

I know right this is weird that I’m coming up with knew things to write about without even trying to. Don’t panic! Don’t panic! You’ll still have your stories too as I know how much you like them.

#throwbackthursday: Lizzysweeklyblogs Success so far

Might do everything backwards today because I feel like it and because I can hehe. So yesterday (14th March 2018) from the minute I woke up to the time I went to bed had to be one of those days where I was like I was being back at my old job that everything seemed to be going wrong but it wasn’t. However today on #throwbackthursday I wanted to share with you guys something very special and something that I’ve only just learnt recently.

If you remember me starting out from day one back in November 2015 where I was starting out but haven’t got a clue what I was doing. I learnt that the other day I had a loads of subscribers without even noticing I had that category my apologies to anyone that I completely ignored. It was set up by an email that I didn’t know at the time or figured out to access it; I’ve now changed so that I know who is registering and who’s posting, if you are one of those people that I didn’t haven’t clue about I’m 100% sorry but this blog is for you. I wanted to share how many subscribers I’ve got so far with you guys and I’m so proud that you guys have been subscribing to me and continuing to as well. Thank you ever so much guys.

We come to followers yes it’s only 5 followers but I’m pretty sure it will raise slowly; yet it got me thinking why everyone is boasting about the whole how many followers they were getting, I was like I’m not getting much no matter how many blogs I do and so on. That’s when I realised everyone has been subscribing to my blog website; I don’t mind either way if you follow you follow you subscribe you subscribe, either which I’m happy but secretly would be nice to see more than 5 and that’s just me to be honest I think I just need to work on that a bit more haha.


Making the mark of 50 likes of my blog post is a great sense of achievement because it shows that my work is actually amazing because I know how critical I am about my work and my pictures. The fact that it’s giving me the voting confidence and believe in myself that it isn’t rubbish but also starting to find my leash or niche whatever you call it theses days. Just want to say a massive thank you to you guys in believing in me and liking my blogs.

 

Wednesday Evening Post: Today just goes out the window!

Not even sure what actually happened today and I’m just literally blogging off my phone because I can and I haven’t prepared today’s Wednesdays Evening post. I’m not even sure what this is about but heyho. Let’s talk about how much I hate adult life of today shall we. Haha

Today one of my best friends decided to ring me at 5:15am forgetting that they are currently 4 hours ahead of me. They were like oh it’s like 9:15am so I photo screened them the time difference done it a few times today. Then half an hour later my job decides to message me to say they need me and I’m like at least I’m half awake nearly.

Then I finally got out of bed about another half an hour later. Hardly awake what so ever then out of the door by 6:45am back home at 9:30am for 4 hours. In that four hours pretty much sorted out something what my friend wanted me to do; afterwards went round my local Sainsbury’s shop and I thought I do a bit of house keeping to get two loafs of bread because someone did the dishwasher, came home had breakfast and etc. Then fell asleep the rest of the time so I can catch up some extra sleep. To which I manage to be completely awake and on caffeine for the next run of my job at 14:15pm (2:15pm) got home at about 16:30/16:30pm (4:30/4:45) to find a parent buying two more loafs of bread. To their realisation that they didn’t know I left a message or brought some already. So extra bread for me to steal in the middle of the night but not sure how long that will last until I react to it.

I thought I’ll do a bit of the house keeping and help get a few bits to get by. Yet I’m trying to get myself back on the right side of everyone but yeah. Sometimes being an adult has its good times and funny moments. Now I’m gonna chill. As you may of noticed that I’ve not even corrected any of my writing in this or anything else. It is what it is with any planning involved. Might need to remember not to do this again on my phone haha. Night people sorry for late posts for somethings. Now you know what a day I have had off the record. Also remember the actual pictures are on the iPad not on phone jeez! Someone give me a holiday please.

Wednesday Online Diary Entries: “Throw those curtains wide” – Story Based

Drinking in the morning sun as I lay out in the garden blinking in the warm morning sun; shaking off all the heavy cold cobwebs that we all had from a very long winter like it was a heavy loaded gun, what made me behave that way? Using the words that I thought I would never say because I can only think it must be live but anyway it looks like a beautiful day.
Someone tell me how I feel by just looking at me but you’re answer is so silly because it’s wrong yet vividly right at the same time; kiss me like it was our final meal tonight as if we were going to die tonight, holy cow I just love your eyes that can only help me to see the light and you’re just laying there with you half awake but look it’s a beautiful day.
When my face is chamois creased you may think I winked at you because I did where you laughed politely as it repeats like you kiss me when my lips are thin. Throw those curtains wide because one day like this a year would honestly see me right; baby just throw those curtains wide as a day like this a year would see me right for life.
Just holy cow I just love your eyes now that I can see the light with you as you thrown the curtains wide like today I could spend my day with you like no one else could. Just throw those curtains wide like today we see the sun beaming down on us.

Everyday Post: “Stephen Hawking has finally let go” – Story Based and in memory of him

The snowglobe snow stayed settled on the bottom of the floor tonight; no matter how much you tried to shake it to make move to watch it float backdown, there was not a footprint or a wheelchair marks to be seen outside and inside the kingdom of isolation of being trapped into ones body. Then again it looks like I’m the next king of science and maths leaving the mark on the world.

The scientists are howling like the swirling storm that’s inside a test tube but they couldn’t keep it in but heaven knows that they tried; don’t let them in don’t let them in be a good mathematic scientist like you always have to be, conceal don’t feel like you have to let them know but now they know and Stephen Hawking would say “Intelligence is the ability to adapt to change.”

Don’t let it hold you back anymore because Stephen Hawking will say once more “I have noticed even people who claim everything is predestined, and that we can do nothing to change it, look before they cross the road.” before turning away and slamming that door. The people who has a learning disability or something that will take their time what are they going to say or do? Just let the storm rage on because it never bothered them anyway.

It’s funny how some distance makes everything seem small to him and the fears that once controlled him now can’t get to him at all. It’s time to see what I can do by testing the limits to make the break through because there’s no right or wrong there’s no rules for him to say he couldn’t do anything as he was free. Stephen once said “I have no idea. People who boast about their IQ are losers.”

It was time for him to let go of what he had suffered for so long he’s now in the wind and the sky; you would never see him cry “I’m not afraid of death, but I’m in no hurry to die. I have so much I want to do first.” yet here I sit and here I’ll stay in the history of time saying that “yes I’m disabled but I know how to carry on with life” the power that I have in my mind will travel through the air and into the ground.
My soul will always be at Cambridge University that one that is crystallises like an icy blast. “It matters if you just don’t give up.” says Stephen the true words if you gave up it wouldn’t matter but it would matter if you don’t give up on yourself. You just rise like the break of dawn and I in the light of the day my conditions never bothered me anyway.

Everyday Post: “I’m alive” – Story Based

When I get my wings to fly I will no that I’m alive as you call for me; as I hear you breathe next to me that’s when I I know that I’ll get my wings to fly because you make me feel that I’m alive, when you look at me across the room I know I can touch the sky as you touch me I know I’m alive and as you blessed the day I just drift away all my worries die. I’m just glad that I’m alive.

You set my heart on fire filling me with love because you made me a women in the clouds above. I couldn’t get much higher than this because my spirit takes a flight because you make me alive. As you call on me I hear you breathe that’s when spirits are higher because god knows that I’ll be the one standing by through the good and the through trying times. It’s only just begun but I can’t wait for the rest of my life. I get wings that would make me fly because god knows that I’m alive on this new day.

I was waiting for so long for a miracle to come because everyone told me to be strong never shed a tear just hold on. Through the darkness and the good times I knew I would make it through the world that I had thought I’d had it all but I was waiting for you; hush now I see the light in the sky that almost blinding me I couldn’t believe that I’ve been touched by my angel with love. Knowing that I am alive now where the rain came down and washed my tears; I let it fill my soul and drown my fears because it shattered the walls for a new sun, and you opened a new day for me to take with you by my side.

When there’s been dark and now there’s light at the end of the tunnel the pain that was there before has been placed by joy and happiness. Where there’s been weakness I have found my strength as all in the eyes of you being there for me. I just can’t believe that you’re my angel that came for me with love and reassurance because you now have brought me a new day with you in it.

Hustle and Bustle Advice of Blogging: What did you do to grow your blog?

Why shouldn’t you know how to grow your own blog posts over time. Ever wanted to know how other bloggers do it? Always envy others because they boost that they’ve got more likes, more followers and etc. I know how that feels a lot of the time; it’s okay I try not brag about it to be honest with you I don’t see the point because at the end of the day people do what they do, and most importantly I do it on a positive side of things where I help people to achieve to where they want to be. Help them to build their confidence up and be with them one step of the way. Knowing that they can refer back to my Hustle and Bustle Advice of Blogging when they need to as the advice is there for them when ever they need it.
Yeah I have confidence issues I think my work is rather shocking but each day I reach over the 20 make each day some days I reach over 30 mark of views. That to me is my proudest moments of views I get; even bonuses that I get at least up to nearly 10 a day nearly of likes than I use to get in the past, it’s just the time, practice, knowing what your niche is and how you feel comfortable about yourself in the world of blogging. I’ll give you my first 6 tips of how I manage to grow my blog post in 2 years and 3 months from November 2015-present. I will revisit this blog over the next year or so if someone who’s really clever in remembering tell me in the next year or so. Thank you hehe.

6 tips to be able to grow your blog post

  • Create 1-3 blogs over the cause of the week to begin with
  • Keep a record of views, visitors, likes and comments etc if your on WordPress this is good because it gives you everything everyday. I use blog planner sheets that’s been created by My May Sunshine mostly use the Social Planner and I write the dates down one side or across the top depending how I do it. I’ll give you two examples for views, visitors, likes and comments at the top and date down the side so I know that I can continue the same page for 20 Days before adding another page to the data collection. Then with the my blog post I make sure that I write the categories down the side, date of the month that I’m doing so I know that I know that I’ve started a new month for the blogs and along the top I use everyday dates as much as I can before the next page is added. I do this with every section for the WordPress has in the everyday part section like refers/ social media, countries and I keep a tally of how many I’ve posted that day and write down the post that I have posted just as a keep sake so I know what I posted and what date I wrote on a plan piece of paper. You’ll find the link here to have a look. http://www.mymaysunshine.com/2013/02/blog-planner-printables-part-1.html
  • Work out what works and what doesn’t work. It’s okay your just finding your feet of what niche that you want to write and that’s goes inside with the records that you’ve been kept because you know what works and what didn’t.
  • Showing that your making process by letting people know your trying your hardest; at the end of the day it’s just a hobby it’s not got to magically happen over night, trust me I have bad days and I don’t want to write so I don’t bother for a few days that’s even I’m stuck.
  • Sometimes rambling blogs like for example my Everyday Online Diary Entries that are Story Based has kicked of dramatically over the past few weeks because I wasn’t too sure what I was doing. Yet everyone seems to be coming back for more each day and I know my regulars as well where they like the blogs.
  • I always added a few other categories some have different types that’s not story based just because it keeps my readers something else to read at the time and on the day.

So that’s my hot 6 tips because I was actually struggling to think of having 10 tips. All I can say is keep trying no matter how much you struggle to write or find ideas sometimes it’s good to take time off now and then just don’t leave it too long. Good luck.

Online Diary Entries: “Nana” – Story Based

The day I wished you’d walked in to my life again just imagine that you just did; I would fill you in on the things that you would have missed, like the sleepless nights that you would have with the hopes of a grown up man dressed in white who claims to be who says he is from the tales of this long standing tradition that you have and I would of thought he might of come just in time to save your life.

Yet as I have waited and waited he didn’t come so you had died. I don’t like it that you’re dead I can’t work it out how that it is impossible; it’s not the same where I scratch my own head to work things out, I know that deep down God doesn’t exist because he was never there to save me and all the palaver surrounding it and it’s like yeah right but I know secretly that you can hear me sometimes.

When I’m cold I reach a fleece that I could borrow for the time being from either TJ or Caspain I’m always trying to keep warm when you’re the sun. That day I sat with you beside your bed crying wishing for the things that I wish I should of said; watching you paint your nails red like you still got now over and over again, and if I live past 72 I do hope I’ll be half as cool as you are.

I got my pen and notepad as I sit in my little cottage window trying to create a story for you tonight; I know how much you like them because I know how to express my feelings through them just to make it feel alright, yet I know I will always keep you close to me because the crowds will understand and relate to the story like you never left.

I think you know I’m not doing so well…

Everyday Post: “That’s my goal” – Story Based

You know where I came from as you know my story otherwise I wouldn’t of been standing here with you tonight; please don’t go I don’t want you to be in a hurry because I announced my love for you, I want to make it clear and make it right for you. Well I know that I’ve acted foolish but I can promise you no more because I’ve finally found that something worth reaching and fight for.

I’m here to say I’m sorry but I’m not here to lie to you I promise you that I’m here in front of you taking your hands to say I’m ready; that I’ve finally thought it through I’m not giving up on our love or letting go of your love, I’m her to win your heart and soul and that’s my goal. Please don’t go you know that I need you as I can’t breath without you be without you; well you know that I’ve acted foolish but I can promise you from the bottom of my heart no more crazy stupid things. Only do them with you because that’s what I love about you.

I won’t stop believe that we will be leaving together because we are made for each other; we been through a lot together, we had arguments, we had our cries, we had laughter and most importantly when I say “I love you” I mean it forever and ever. I’m here to say I’m sorry. I’m not here to lie to you I’m here to say “I’m ready to give up everything for you” I’ve finally here as I thought it through and I’m not here to let you’re love go. I’m not giving up because I’m here to win your heart and would because you’re my goal.