Online Diary Entries: Vogues – 73 Question Tags

Just want to give a massive big shout out to Purrpale who’s either my subscriber or follower for giving me an inspiration; as I was struggling to think of my fourth blog post for the day, if her email didn’t come through to me saying what she had posted I wouldn’t of done this tag. Thank you lovely keep it up with the good work hun keep being positive. http://purrpale.com – the blogger that I just mentioned.

1.What’s the best thing that happened to you this month? Don’t even remember erm probably a few snow days at the beginning of March 2018
2. What is something you’re tired of? Tired of people make up lies, ask for advice and then through it back into my face or just look for an argument to take it out on you for no reason at all.
3. What is something that recently moved you? Not sure really. Hearing about the kids that I’ve worked with and how they made so much progress.
4. If you could teach one subject in school what would it be? Creative Writing just to be able to go with the flow and see what they come up with.
5. What’s your favourite beverage? Coke (fizzy) any flavour and doesn’t matter if it has to be diet, Coke Zero, caffeine free Diet Coke and etc. I drink any of them I’m just that weird.
6. What’s your favourite cocktail? Sour cocktails with Pepsi (pepsi, diet, pepsi max)
7. What is your favourite birthday cake? Blonde Cake, as it’s the only cake I would eat and it’s taken me years to be able to start liking birthday cakes.
8.What is one thing you still have from your childhood? Learning difficulties
9. What is your favourite movie? All time favourite has to be Harry Potter
10. What is something you can’t do? Reaching up for something that doesn’t land on my head without fail.
11. What is one habit you wish you could break? To be able to stop having anxiety attacks for no apparent reason. If that’s possible?
12. What makes you laugh no matter what? My best friend Megs when she doesn’t make me mad she always find away to be clumsy no matter what.
13. What does creativity mean to you? To be able to escape from everything and be in another dimension or another world.
14. What are your favourite lyrics of all time? Not sure I have loads
15. What is something you’ve always wanted to try but you’ve been too scared to do? To be able to do things that I know I would be able to do without being judged or reminded off.
16. Best advice for your 19 year old self? If I knew what I now but tell myself back then I would probably say “don’t be a plank stick up for yourself” or “keep what your doing your fine”
17. If you could raid one woman’s closet who would it be? Not even sure to be honest
18. Must have purse item? None above to be honest not a purse freak
19. What did you want to do with your life at age 12? Absolutely nothing I don’t think can’t even remember it
20. What is something you will not be doing in ten years? Hopefully something like staying at home in my parents house.
21. What is an important life lesson for someone to learn? Remember broke heart fixes itself over time if you remember your true friends and family who know how it feels like to either loose someone close or they split from someone. Yes your in pain but just don’t be a dick towards people who are there for you no matter what.
22. What is one goal you are determined to achieve in your lifetime? To be able to live my life to full extent of happiness with projects that I want to do.
23. Would you ever live anywhere besides Guildford? Anywhere but Guildford if someone gave me a golden ticket
24.What is your favourite dessert? Hot chocolate cake but don’t really have desserts that often
25. Is there a dessert you don’t like? Apple crumble
26. It’s brunch! What do you eat?  If I could tradition english breakfast
27. Who is your favourite painter? Don’t have one
28. Favourite Disney animal? Tinkerbell
29. What is a book you are planning on reading? Reading what’s that? Hehe
30. What did you read most recently? Can’t remember the last book I read
31. Favourite solo artist? Currently Demi Lovato
32. What’s your favourite board game? Monopoly
33. What’s a city you wish to visit? Not even sure to be honest London would be awesome to go and stay for the weekend or something
34. Heels or flats? Flats all the way
35.  Where does one go on a perfect road trip? Tour around Britain I think
36. What do you do on a rainy day? Sleep, Blog, Netflix, candy crush hehe
37. What’s your favourite exercise? Not moving out of my bed if I don’t need to. Hehe
38. What was your worst subject in school? Who the hell invented maths
39. What is your spirit animal? Dolphin if I did have one
40. What do you usually eat for breakfast? Don’t even know I’m not sure
41. What do you usually eat for dinner? Depends what’s being cooked but if I could nothing to be honest unless if I was hungry.
42. Cooking or Baking? Neither
43. Favourite baked good? Huh what’s this question about? I had at cooking
44. What is something you wish you could be good at? Something I wish I was good at is be okay in talking in public. I think.
45. Skiing or Surfing? Surfing if I tired it. Skiing no thanks I tried and panic because of my brother breaking one of his legs on same ski slope at the same school.
46. First celebrity crush? Hugh Grant I think it was
47. Most recent celebrity crush? Tom Hardy
48. What colour was your prom dress? Black and cream
49. How do you manage stress? Before I would reach 0-60 in a matter of seconds but now I try and rationalise it before I get that far.
50. What do you do to relax? Talk to my close friends, blog or Netflix
51. Age when you were first kissed?  First proper kiss was at age 21 long history
52. Place you were first kissed? At a back of a store
53. Favourite fashion trend of all time? Don’t really follow a trend to be honest once I see something that I like then I’ll do it how I like it
54. Best fashion advice you’ve ever received? Don’t even know if I had one
55. Trend you would like to see disappear forever?  Things that don’t make any sense to me what so ever. What ever that is?
56. Shoes or Bags? Neither
57. How do you know if you’re in love? When you actually get on well with someone and you both can non stop talking about anything. You both like each other more.
58. Television show you’ve binged on recently? Can’t remember the last one I most binged on recently but I can remember one or two it has to be “The Grimm” and “Touch”
59. Who do you turn to when you’re sad? The closest friends that have the time for me when I need them the most.
60. Name one thing you’ve learned the hard way? To not let people in who you think they are your friends but actually they aren’t. They are completely a utter….(you get my point)
61. If you could make a documentary about anything what would it be? If I could make a documentary about anything it would be if I met a royal from another country or here I would treat them normal and teach them what it’s like to be a citizen that’s not in the public eye. Also how we became friends along with them teaching me how their life works as well to show each other how each other’s lives are different.
62. What is your kryptonite? My weakness are letting bad memories and etc coming back to me when I don’t want them to
63. What are you most enchanted by? The most thing that I’m enchanted by is that I’ve got good friends that love me no matter what and telling me that I’m a plank and stop beaten myself. Just to confirm that I’m being stupid over thinking things.
64. What is your biggest strength? Believing in others, put confidence in others and care about people.
65. What is your biggest weaknesses? That I don’t believe in myself and etc really.
66. What are 3 words to describe living in Guildford? Historically, annoying and noisy
67. Cutest thing on planet earth? Huskies
68. Most important advice you’d give your future children? “You’ve got Arrow blood in you. Don’t take crap from nobody understood” the fact that I’ve heard stories of what my dad got up too and my grandad along with trying to defend myself with things that I don’t want to discuss. At the end of the day just got turn your negativity into a positive just got to learn to stand on your own two feet.
69. Best first date idea? A chat over a drink probably best way for me to fiddle with a glass to be honest.
70. Favourite type of flower?  Daisies
71. What do you first notice about someone when you meet them? They are hot and cute. Sometimes you weren’t what I thought you were. It’s hard to tell when you don’t know them that well.
72. What’s your guilty pleasure? Junk food because that’s always me go to comfort along with Most Haunted.
73. Plans for the weekend? Don’t even plan a head to be honest.
That’s my daily tag done guys and that was long haha. I would nominate someone but I think you all should try it to be honest. I just copied and pasted then changed the answers to my own.

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Everyday Post: “Living in a shadow” – Story Based

I was six years old as my parents chose to go away yet I was stuck inside a broken life that nobody couldn’t wish away for me not even me; as I was growing up she was so beautiful she had everything and even more, I had nothing other her left over stuff that she didn’t want or just cheap stuff and my only escape was to hide or just running out of the door.
Somebody listen to me please because I’m so use to be hard even being me; yet living in the shadow of someone else’s dream I’m so tired of trying to find a hand to hold but everything that I touched felt cold to me, yet living in a nightmare with no hope or guidance it’s like a never-ending sleep but now I’m wide awake my chains are finally free. So don’t feel sorry for me because all the days collided on less perfect than the next.
I was so stuck inside in someone else’s life because I was always second best “oh I love you now because I realise that it’s safe to be outside to be able to come alive and be who I am. So if you’re listening there’s so much more to me that you haven’t seen; mother, sister, father, sister, mother everything is cool my life is so good. I’ve got more than anyone should because my life is so good; I’m ready to put the past in the past, I was living in the shadow of someone else’s dream was so hard to find my own as everything that I hold everything I touched at the time felt cold to me. Yet I’m loving and living a new day because I’m living it for me; now the I’m wide awake and that I can finally see for who I am, don’t feel sorry for me that you weren’t there for me as you were so wrapped up in her world.
Living in, living in, living in the shadow will be in the back of my mind but I’m always going to live in a new day wether you three are in my life or not.

Monday Online Diary Entries: “The truth about liars” – Story Based

You can say what you want about me and do what you want to me but guess what you cannot stop me from telling the truth of how much of a lair you are about things. I’ve been knocked down so many times in this crazy town; someone even tried to punch me in the face in L.A but there’s nothing in the world that you keep me from doing anything that I want to do, because I’m too proud and I’m too strong to let you ruining my life. At the end of the day you have to life by the code by moving on rather than feeling sorry for yourself because I haven’t got anybody around.
So I held my head high as I knew I’d have to survive through this well that’s because I made it and I don’t hate it that’s just the way it goes. I’ve done it and got through it by standing on my own two feet because I paid my dues of going out with you. You tried to hold me down. Put me down. Yet you can’t stop me. So like I just told you; you cannot will not stop me as I’ve paid my dues.
Now I’m tested everyday people who are trying to mess with me because they’ve got nothing in common because I can handle mine and I thought I better let you know that I’m no punk all because I can’t get down. Tell you the truth I don’t give a damn about who’s around that was fine until now that it took me so long to get myself here; I won’t live in fear anymore of you or you trying my shine agains, because they want to build you up before they tear you down again and it’s a struggle in trying to keep the bubble a float.
Why did you like to everyone? You can’t be trusted you good for nothing type of brother; everything that you claimed to be was a lie because you know that I would be at that place or once went there, and you think everyone will believe your sob stories but actually they come running to me and I put them straight. Why did you lie to everyone you creepy, sneaky little shit your so messed up it’s now time to leave. So bye, bye.

Online Diary Entries: “Nana” – Story Based

The day I wished you’d walked in to my life again just imagine that you just did; I would fill you in on the things that you would have missed, like the sleepless nights that you would have with the hopes of a grown up man dressed in white who claims to be who says he is from the tales of this long standing tradition that you have and I would of thought he might of come just in time to save your life.

Yet as I have waited and waited he didn’t come so you had died. I don’t like it that you’re dead I can’t work it out how that it is impossible; it’s not the same where I scratch my own head to work things out, I know that deep down God doesn’t exist because he was never there to save me and all the palaver surrounding it and it’s like yeah right but I know secretly that you can hear me sometimes.

When I’m cold I reach a fleece that I could borrow for the time being from either TJ or Caspain I’m always trying to keep warm when you’re the sun. That day I sat with you beside your bed crying wishing for the things that I wish I should of said; watching you paint your nails red like you still got now over and over again, and if I live past 72 I do hope I’ll be half as cool as you are.

I got my pen and notepad as I sit in my little cottage window trying to create a story for you tonight; I know how much you like them because I know how to express my feelings through them just to make it feel alright, yet I know I will always keep you close to me because the crowds will understand and relate to the story like you never left.

I think you know I’m not doing so well…

Everyday Post: “That’s my goal” – Story Based

You know where I came from as you know my story otherwise I wouldn’t of been standing here with you tonight; please don’t go I don’t want you to be in a hurry because I announced my love for you, I want to make it clear and make it right for you. Well I know that I’ve acted foolish but I can promise you no more because I’ve finally found that something worth reaching and fight for.

I’m here to say I’m sorry but I’m not here to lie to you I promise you that I’m here in front of you taking your hands to say I’m ready; that I’ve finally thought it through I’m not giving up on our love or letting go of your love, I’m her to win your heart and soul and that’s my goal. Please don’t go you know that I need you as I can’t breath without you be without you; well you know that I’ve acted foolish but I can promise you from the bottom of my heart no more crazy stupid things. Only do them with you because that’s what I love about you.

I won’t stop believe that we will be leaving together because we are made for each other; we been through a lot together, we had arguments, we had our cries, we had laughter and most importantly when I say “I love you” I mean it forever and ever. I’m here to say I’m sorry. I’m not here to lie to you I’m here to say “I’m ready to give up everything for you” I’ve finally here as I thought it through and I’m not here to let you’re love go. I’m not giving up because I’m here to win your heart and would because you’re my goal.

Sunday Online Diary Entries: “Do I really want you back.” – Story Based

Have you ever wonder if this is the last time I see your face? Is it tears or is fucking rain saying “thank god he’s gone” I wish I could say something that doesn’t sound insane but lately I haven’t trusted my brain because you tell me that you’ll change but I just see what you can do and say nothing. No matter where I go I get the same blooming question “do I really want you back?” I know that I will never get over you but then I’m kicking myself because I’m lying to myself every time. I don’t actually want you back because you’re a piece of tool that I’ve thrown at the back of the garage that I don’t want because it’s broken.
Do you always remember how you made me laugh in the mornings when I wake up; yet you don’t understand how much you hurt me even when you try to make it all right, yet I still reach for you and the day I chose to tell you this is going to work anymore because I’m hurting and I’m ready to move on but I still dream of you. I know even when I said that I’ve moved on I’m still dreaming of you; I know that you’re gone now but I still blame myself of where I gone wrong but you come back, into my life saying you’ve changed.
Yet I know when something that kills you makes you stronger because you know that you’re not alone in the end as I’m starting to realise I’m so much better without you. So I ask myself do I really want you back in my life? The answer is no because at the end of the day you hurt me and you have to work on gaining my trust from what you have done to me. All the end it’s worth it because I know your true colours in the end.

Sunday Special: “Singing my heart out” – Mothers Day Special UK (11.3.18) – Story Based

In the winds of the British Isles words float from every country and commonwealth that belong to the United Kingdom; even with every tune from every country playing for Mother’s Day, the words sounds like how much people love each other especially their mothers who may have passed away or out in war zones or somewhere else.
Some words they can’t be spoken but only sung. So when you hear a thousand voices shouting love there’s a place where there is actually time in this life where you can sing what you are feeling. I remember you telling me to find my feet and stand my ground because don’t you see the whole world is listening to what we have to say right now?
The winds sing it louder sing it clearer knowing that everyone will hear you because as your making some of the noises you would find your voice tonight; make it stronger by singing it together which will make this moment of love last forever, even the love and the young are shouting their love tonight.
To be able to sing we had to wait like a lifetime to be able to see a thousand faces to celebrate together; you had brought hope, brought life conquer fear when it wasn’t always so easy but as you stood your ground by keeping your faith, yet you don’t see it right now but the world is listening to what we have to say.
As we sing it louder and more clearly knowing that everyone will hear you speak because you always told us to make a noise to find our voices tonight; by singing it stronger and being together we can make this feeling last forever, wether your old or young we are shouting love tonight.
Some words only be spoken but otherwise they can’t be spoke but only to be sung. To be able to hear the thousand voices is to be able to open your window of your bedroom hearing the words of love, life and hope. To be able to hear a thousand voices shouting love for you.

Everyday Post: “Beautiful World” – Story Based

As I’m here standing in the rain because the sun has gone again and there’s nothing going change; time seems like a million thousand years yet I need a little time to get you back into my sight once more because you slipped out of my reach once again, there’s nothing that heals the pain except you and I know that it’s you that’s stopping me from falling. As I’m crashing down losing ground until I see you again and you know that sun will shine again because we know that we will see there’s nothing standing in our way.

Love will stand it will never break but I can tell you that I never thought this could be me; do you feel what I feel? Because every time that your near it’s such a beautiful world, a beautiful world. The words that I have for you is too hard to keep inside even though I’ve tried but it’s impossible to hide because you know how much I love you and you know that it’s you that’s stopping me from falling.

The world underneath my feet is crushing down losing ground until I see you again and you know that I’ll be the stars guiding you to the place that you would hide. I would run a thousand miles. The thousand miles that you ran for me I’ll be able to do the same just to be at your side. It’s our beautiful world that we created together.

Saturday Online Diary Entries: “Coming back home” – Story Based

Another summer’s day has come and gone away like in Paris and Rome; I just want to come home because I missing you so much and you know it, yet I’m surrounded by people that I don’t truly know and I feel more alone I just want to come home. I miss you more and more you know me so well. I’ve been keeping all the letters that I wrote to you with one a line or two with “I’m fine baby how are you?” I know I would send them but it’s just not enough because you deserve more than that of the words that are cold and flat.
Another aeroplane. Another sunny place. I know I should be lucky but I just want to go home; I’m pleading with my assistants and security to take me home because I got to go home, let me go home I’m too far from where you are I’ve got to go home I’m missing you so much. I’ve had my run baby you know when I’m done I just want to come home to have my hug and have my safety net near me at all times.
The fact that I just feel like I’m living someone else’s life like everything is going right as I stepped outside; I know you couldn’t come along with me because this wasn’t you’re dream but you always believed in me and you decided to come with me a few times. Yet another winter day has come and gone away either in Paris or Rome and I want to come home to be with you because I miss you so much you know.
Let me go home I’ve had my run because I’m done now I’ve finished my tour around the world; I’m done now everything will be alright because I’ll be home tonight, I’m coming back home.

Friday Time Recap Time: Time to chill

I’m not your average 20+ year old who goes out on a Friday night just to get hammered or anything like that; I just like to chill, blog if I need to, watch things and have my bed to myself monjority of the time. I tend to go out if I have arranged something but that’s not all the time because money is tight these days but people who go out drinking wish they didn’t after the next day with a massive hangover. I happily just chill with my peeps over the phone and what not.

Wish I never read out the menu of Burger King now to a child to keep them occupied I really want a junkie food again. There’s my alcohol money goes to on junk food haha if I wanted to get waisted I would of gone out and do that but it just doesn’t appeal to me to get waisted like other people and cause fights.

What do you do on your Friday nights let me know? Just for fun as I’m just chilling out and not bothering to do anything.