Wednesday Online Diary Entries: “I see the light” – Story Based

All those days watching from the windows like all those years outside looking in; all that time never even knowing just how blind that I’ve been, now that I am here blinking in the starlight now that I’m here suddenly I see standing here it’s all so clear. Knowingly I’m where I’m meant to be like at last I’ve seen the light like it had been lifted; at last I see the light like the sky is new bringing in the warm, the real and the brightness but the world has somehow shifted. All at once everything looks different now that I see you in my world you are my prince of my life.
All those days chasing down a daydream all those years living in a blur but at the time; they were never truly seeing things as they were but now she’s here shining in the starlight she’s here suddenly I know that it’s crystal clear where I meant to go, and at last I see he light like the fog of pain has been lifted knowing that she’s been protecting me.
At last we see the light like the sky is new with the warmth, real and bright like the world has somehow shifted all at once everything is different now that we can see each other. I know that we will be together one day soon.

Wednesday Online Diary Entries: “Throw those curtains wide” – Story Based

Drinking in the morning sun as I lay out in the garden blinking in the warm morning sun; shaking off all the heavy cold cobwebs that we all had from a very long winter like it was a heavy loaded gun, what made me behave that way? Using the words that I thought I would never say because I can only think it must be live but anyway it looks like a beautiful day.
Someone tell me how I feel by just looking at me but you’re answer is so silly because it’s wrong yet vividly right at the same time; kiss me like it was our final meal tonight as if we were going to die tonight, holy cow I just love your eyes that can only help me to see the light and you’re just laying there with you half awake but look it’s a beautiful day.
When my face is chamois creased you may think I winked at you because I did where you laughed politely as it repeats like you kiss me when my lips are thin. Throw those curtains wide because one day like this a year would honestly see me right; baby just throw those curtains wide as a day like this a year would see me right for life.
Just holy cow I just love your eyes now that I can see the light with you as you thrown the curtains wide like today I could spend my day with you like no one else could. Just throw those curtains wide like today we see the sun beaming down on us.

Wednesday Online Diary Entries: “Bad Day” – Story Based

Where is the moment when we needed a friend the most as you tried to kick up the leaves but the magic was lost; as I watch you walk on by completely ignoring me that I was there, they tell me your blue skies had faded to grey along with your passion for things had gone away and they told me that you didn’t need to carry on. Yet they had asked me to help you get by.

As I got up with my notebook and pen I tagged along to see if I you even notice if I was there; you shrugged when I spoke to you like you couldn’t care less if I was or not, you just stood there in the line like you just hit a new low and you’re just faking a smile with the coffee to go. As we sat in your office with the door closed you told me that your life has been way off line because something would trigger it off and you start to fall to pieces every time like your too tire to carry on.

As your bad day rolled in to every other day. You’re just taking one day at a time hoping that it would get better but you start singing a sad song; all you need to do is turn it around yet you say you don’t know how, and tell me to not lie because one day you will top yourself if it doesn’t work. You work at that smile and to for a ride because you had a bad day do something that you like doing to cheer yourself up; the camera doesn’t lie as you’re coming back down, you know you really don’t mind you had a bad day that you manage to turn it around.

All you need is a blue sky holiday to which you are entitled for even to the point of they would laugh at what you say; all I know is that you don’t need to carry on because your going on holiday because you know when sometimes the system goes on a blink inside you, you need to take some time off knowing that the whole thing could turn out wrong when your away. You know that your not in the wrong.

You went on the trip that I took you on where the passion is to help you when you needed it the most; oh by the way it’s just you and I on this trip, no one else and it’s just going to be the most well deserved break that you need in the sun. No more bad days for awhile.

Wednesday Online Diary Entries: “If you seek Lizzy” – Story

Lalalala blah blah blah I’m not taking much notice of your stupid empty threats that you make in the newspapers like have you seen Lizzy? Who is Lizzy? Guess what I own it because I know I got my radar on you because I know the truth it should of been have you seen Mia? Have you seen Mia tonight? Is she in the bathroom? Is she smoking outside?

Oh hunny guess what you can take piece of lime that me and Caspian are not going to by for you because I know what she’s like; a self centred women who doesn’t actually care about anyone except herself, just tell me if you have seen near by my house or near me or Caspian and I can’t get her off my brain as I see her a threat I want someone to take her home before she breaks my rules and contract that she signed.

You can love me hate me you can say what you want about me but all of the girls telling and begging me not to rise to it because I know you want to seek me to get back to me. Love me hate me but you can’t see what I see your too blind of hatred yet the secret services have told me that you want to meet up with me and beat me up. Yet you stood there feeling humiliated with all the crowds especially all the press because I didn’t show.

I’ve seen her once or twice since being here with Caspian since she knew my face but it was a bit hard to see to make sure where all of the people standing in the way. You can say what you want about me but actually you can’t see what I see; next time you tell me that you see her I want to know what she looks like and what she’s wearing because her outfits make her look old. If your going to seek me out? Or stalk me? Do it much better than you are already because you just need to get out of my way. It won’t be long until I show you who I really am.

Wednesday Online Diary Entries: Behind the Hazel eyes – Story

“Do not pity the dead, Harry, pity the living, and above all those who live without love” – Dumbledore From The Deathly Hallows in a memory of a relative who passed away.
Just seemed like just yesterday you were a part of me where I use to be able to stand so tall; I use to be so strong with your arms around me tight like everything felt so right, even when I have had my bad days with everything would just fall apart. Even with the happiness having you around it was like the unbreakable can happen; now I can’t breathe, not even being able to sleep I’m barely hanging on the ropes. Yet here I am once again I’m torn into pieces because I’m standing at your side. You were always the one there when I needed you. Now I’m broken up deep inside; now you won’t get to see the tears that I cry for the final time, even behind these hazel eyes.
I told you everything when I opened up and let you in because loving you made me feel alright for once in my life; now all that’s what left of me is all the happy memories that we made, all of the birthday cards and christmas cards that you made over the years. This is what I’m going to have to do is pretend to be okay when I’m so broken up deep inside because I can’t breathe to which I can’t sleep I’m just barely hanging on.
Swallow me then spit me out. For hating you for leaving me on my own I blame myself seeing you like this it kills me now; no I don’t cry on the outside anymore because here I am once again I’m torn into pieces I can’t deny it can’t pretend it you were the one that I adopted and adored the most, I’m so broken up deep inside you can’t see the last tears that I cry anymore.
“Happiness can be found, even in the darkest of times, if only one remembers to turn on the light” – Dumbledore – The Prisoner Of Azkaban (from screenplay by Steven Kloves)

Wednesday Online Diary Entries: It’s only Wednesday! (Wednesday Evening Post)

The fact that I’m that tired I can’t even remember what the Wednesday Online Diary Entries picture is; I can barely keep my eyes open to have a look properly so I decided to put Wednesday Evening Post pictures up, doesn’t matter to be honest as it’s Wednesday and it’s mid week I might as well use Wednesday Online Diary Entries under the Evening Post.

As it’s end of January 2018 I have to say I managed to keep my self going over the past month no matter how hard it was to continue fight with my personal problems throughout this month; the first time in three years this is the first time for me to start taking control of some of my personal life, than I have had previously 2 years and I wanted to share with you guys the success of having you guys keeping me going. Thank you.

This week has to be a very long but dragging I’m not even sure why it just seems longer to me for some odd reason. The fact that it’s Wednesday and nowhere nearer to Friday or nowhere near Monday; just smack bam in the middle of the week, even today has been so dreadful that I’ve been not myself. I even had force myself to get next months data sheets sorted before tomorrow to which I would of sorted them out earlier in the day if I was awake. I couldn’t even remember what the date of the month was for awhile as I started to wish the months away by writing the 8th month instead of the 2nd month.

I’m just glad that January Blues 18 is now well and truly over. Cheers everybody let’s enjoy the 28 days of February 18.

Wednesday Online Diary Entries: Footprints in the sand.

In a memory of someone that I have recently lost and the rest of my family.

You walked with me along the sand; as I could see you’re footprints in the sand and helped me to understand where I’m going. You walked with me as I was alone with so much unknown along the way; then I heard you say “I promise you I’m always there. When your heart is filled with sorrow and despair I’ll carry you even when you need a friend. You’ll find my footprints in the sand”

I see my life flash across the sky so many times have I been so afraid and just when I thought I’d lost my way. However you gave me strength to carry on that’s when I knew you found the rest of the family and someone else who’s close to me and someone else. That’s when I heard you say “I promise you. I’m always there when your heart is filled with sorrow and despair. I’ll carry you when you need a friend. You will find an extra footprints in the sand even if your weary I will know that you’ll be there.”