Wednesday Online Diary Entries: Behind the Hazel eyes – Story

“Do not pity the dead, Harry, pity the living, and above all those who live without love” – Dumbledore From The Deathly Hallows in a memory of a relative who passed away.
Just seemed like just yesterday you were a part of me where I use to be able to stand so tall; I use to be so strong with your arms around me tight like everything felt so right, even when I have had my bad days with everything would just fall apart. Even with the happiness having you around it was like the unbreakable can happen; now I can’t breathe, not even being able to sleep I’m barely hanging on the ropes. Yet here I am once again I’m torn into pieces because I’m standing at your side. You were always the one there when I needed you. Now I’m broken up deep inside; now you won’t get to see the tears that I cry for the final time, even behind these hazel eyes.
I told you everything when I opened up and let you in because loving you made me feel alright for once in my life; now all that’s what left of me is all the happy memories that we made, all of the birthday cards and christmas cards that you made over the years. This is what I’m going to have to do is pretend to be okay when I’m so broken up deep inside because I can’t breathe to which I can’t sleep I’m just barely hanging on.
Swallow me then spit me out. For hating you for leaving me on my own I blame myself seeing you like this it kills me now; no I don’t cry on the outside anymore because here I am once again I’m torn into pieces I can’t deny it can’t pretend it you were the one that I adopted and adored the most, I’m so broken up deep inside you can’t see the last tears that I cry anymore.
“Happiness can be found, even in the darkest of times, if only one remembers to turn on the light” – Dumbledore – The Prisoner Of Azkaban (from screenplay by Steven Kloves)

Wednesday Online Diary Entries: It’s only Wednesday! (Wednesday Evening Post)

The fact that I’m that tired I can’t even remember what the Wednesday Online Diary Entries picture is; I can barely keep my eyes open to have a look properly so I decided to put Wednesday Evening Post pictures up, doesn’t matter to be honest as it’s Wednesday and it’s mid week I might as well use Wednesday Online Diary Entries under the Evening Post.

As it’s end of January 2018 I have to say I managed to keep my self going over the past month no matter how hard it was to continue fight with my personal problems throughout this month; the first time in three years this is the first time for me to start taking control of some of my personal life, than I have had previously 2 years and I wanted to share with you guys the success of having you guys keeping me going. Thank you.

This week has to be a very long but dragging I’m not even sure why it just seems longer to me for some odd reason. The fact that it’s Wednesday and nowhere nearer to Friday or nowhere near Monday; just smack bam in the middle of the week, even today has been so dreadful that I’ve been not myself. I even had force myself to get next months data sheets sorted before tomorrow to which I would of sorted them out earlier in the day if I was awake. I couldn’t even remember what the date of the month was for awhile as I started to wish the months away by writing the 8th month instead of the 2nd month.

I’m just glad that January Blues 18 is now well and truly over. Cheers everybody let’s enjoy the 28 days of February 18.

Wednesday Online Diary Entries: Footprints in the sand.

In a memory of someone that I have recently lost and the rest of my family.

You walked with me along the sand; as I could see you’re footprints in the sand and helped me to understand where I’m going. You walked with me as I was alone with so much unknown along the way; then I heard you say “I promise you I’m always there. When your heart is filled with sorrow and despair I’ll carry you even when you need a friend. You’ll find my footprints in the sand”

I see my life flash across the sky so many times have I been so afraid and just when I thought I’d lost my way. However you gave me strength to carry on that’s when I knew you found the rest of the family and someone else who’s close to me and someone else. That’s when I heard you say “I promise you. I’m always there when your heart is filled with sorrow and despair. I’ll carry you when you need a friend. You will find an extra footprints in the sand even if your weary I will know that you’ll be there.”