In the memory of Princess Diana

Over the years that have gone by when we have lost one true amazing women that changed the world; by her warm loving heart, her glowing smile so sparkling that you can’t help but to smile and chuckle. When she passed away in the tragic accident in 1997 I was about 7 or 8 at the time; I always liked Princess Diana as she was the most successful lady; that I think I looked up too at the time, still do in lots of ways than one. As I heard what happened at the time; I would sit on my bunk bed at the time, I would pray to god to look after Prince Harry and Prince William as they were going through a difficult time. 

As the years gone by I would look out in the way something was telling me; to keep an eye out for them, I don’t know if this is true or not. I would hear good news about how they turned their lives around; even through the darkest times of events when they came face to face them, yet bounce back and say “no this is not what I want. I’m sure that this wasn’t what my mum wanted me to do” 

I’m glad and I think Diana is glad that Harry and William have stuck together like glue; keeping each other company, tell each other things and most importantly letting another wonderful lady like Diana into their lives. Not just a wife, sister in law, or a mother but strong happy women that I think Diana would of loved to meet and share things with Kate. Kate took on that role because she shares the same dream as Diana; everyone should be able to live like everyone else, carrying on the tradition of helping William and Harry out but also to show two sides of the world for Prince George and Princess Charlotte. 

Even though I don’t know Prince Harry and Prince William I feel like I should protect them; as like two brothers I’m not sure but like I said before I feel like I’m their guardian angel or something, I don’t know it’s makes me worry what’s actually going on in their heads at the time. It’s probably nothing it’s all in my head. 

I do reckon that Diana is proud of her boys; keeping up with what she has taught them from a young age, to have a normal life as much as they can. Show the goodness in their hearts and be true to themselves. By letting them choose their own paths as she never got a chance to finish it off; but getting to see her boys doing it for her, knowing that her legacy is in their hands. 

One year back in 2007 my aunt took a nice picture of me that she had thought I looked the way Princess Diana had looked; when she was having her pictures taken, especially when she did her charity work with children in Africa. Also it’s one of my favourite pictures of me and my dad’s favourite especially. This was when I was 16 years old; just as I left school completely, as my cousin was just about to start the same secondary school that I left at. I was brace enough to have my hair cut short, blonde and spike. I think that’s why I like this picture more than the others over the years; also I believe that people come back but through someone else, I’m not sure how that works but I do believe is true.

R.I.P Princess Diana and happy birthday. 


When your best friend tries to do a surprise/how to create new friendships.

The day that you best friend gives your email address to their grandmother; even if it was a massive surprise, your immediate reaction is to want to punch them. Of course I wouldn’t do that but as a friend/friendly punch that I do to my friends.

The most awkward thing can ever happen is when your best friend trying to do a surprise for you; you know when you hate surprises but they still trying to do something nice for you, it was still a surprise when you know who it is. 

Yep my friend had just done that number on me; thanks Caspian now I’ve got to get use to that one as well, not like it’s awkward enough. To be fair good call on the whole front of introducing me to the family slowly; than quickly throw me into the deep end of everything, but really I’ve just got use to you haha. All well. 

I don’t mind with the whole family affair of people talking to me; but I do love Caspian grandmother, the way he talks about her and that we have similar characteristics. On which reminds him that I’m like her in so many ways; to which point Missy his grandmother, I do have to say is one incredible woman being determined to talk to me even on a late hour. 

My grandparents wouldn’t even know what half of the social media is; even when one of them has it, but still doesn’t understand how to use it but wants to look at what his grandchildren are doing. 

However creating new friendships through people is the best way forward; otherwise you will never get very far in life, if your going down the same road with the same friends etc. It’s hard that once you got use to your friends that you made; then when you make new ones somewhere else, you don’t know what to do or what to say. Here are some useful tips on getting passed that initial fear of meeting new people.

  1. Realising that your fear of meeting new people is most probably all inside your head – Each time you move around wether it’s from moving house, jobs, schools or even just want to meet new people to get out of your comfort zone. You start to think no one will like me, they will look into my past and judge me, judge me for who I am and etc. Which isn’t true; unless they are a bad egg then ignore them; they are worthless people, who need to change.
  2. Start out with a group of people who you are already friends with – No matter don’t forget your other friends when you move on; the best part is that they’ve always got your back no matter what, also you can expand on meeting new people through them as well. 
  3. Get yourself out there – Most people like me are quite shy and etc but at times you have to push yourself, keep showing up, do something that’s strong and that will help you get noticed.
  4. Take the first step – realising of taking the first step is the hardest thing ever; look for something that’s more interesting to you, than that doesn’t interest in you. Stimulating your mind helps you focus and explore more to help open more in your brain to connect with each other. 
  5. Be open minded – be open minded because if you don’t you will never know; embrace the unknown, don’t knock it before you try it, say “yes” than say “no” otherwise people may think your lazy or something, think 3 positives and one negative and etc
  6. Get to know the person – Get to know the person you could either play games like would you rather, get to know someone knew by learning how they think, instate the conversion, show your best self, be friendly, be patient, respect other people’s interest, pay close attention to the person, stay independent, spend time together, let there be positives and negatives, let the person know your interests are, share information and feelings, invite them to gatherings, spend more time together.
  7. Connect with genuine person – Always try to understand what people really mean when they speak, Always let the speaker be the star, The Barrier. This is going to back fire on me is so many ways; as you will see the next value point, in this moment in time. You may have your own thoughts and feelings about things; but you have the right to have opinions, so does the other person if you don’t agree with them. Nevertheless they may become over powering but let them; as long as you know that your true to yourself, what’s more you know your rights. 
  8. Be yourself – Get in touch with your inner child, Become more aware of your thoughts. As I said in the last point I’m going back fire on myself here but it all ties in together; just be yourself and stay true to yourself no matter what people say or do, you have your own mind. 
  9. Be there for them – Reach out – a conversation, text or call goes a long way, Listen, don’t judge, Do something together. Good friends are always there to reach out to their friends in need; no matter how far away they are, they will always be there by a phone call away. 
  10. Make the effort to stay in touch – Social Media: A Blessing and a Curse, Why Don’t You Just Call Them?, Coping With Guilt, Overcoming Awkwardness. No matter if a friend has moved away or moved on; always make an effort to stay in touch no matter how busy you are, or what’s gone on just get in touch every so often.

Life crisis your only 26 years old 

You guys are probably thinking oh why am I listening to her about her life crisis; I can tell you now when you read this, or when you have finished you will think “oh damn she’s right”. So button it shrimpy! Haha jokes on you. 

So this is a story that I’ve never told; well publicly I haven’t but making you aware young ones, even adults might want to hear this or read this as well. To which they can be aware the warning signs of health issues within themselves or their child. 

About 12 or 13 was the time when I first start my first period; yes I’m going there people, tough luck people it’s got to happen one way or another. Even I didn’t want to do it but then I had to push the boat out and do it; not for myself but my fellow readers, also young readers who feel embarrassed about these things and most importantly peer pressure around school. When I started I was at wedding in a my local church that my parents went to; I had started not to feel to brilliantly with tummy cramps and everything, I didn’t know what was happening. Until I got home and went to the bathroom that’s when I noticed I had started; so I didn’t know want to do, so I called my mum to come up and she explained everything to me. 

Over the years at school I would have to be sent home because I was feeling brilliant it was always around the time I was on; the most awarked time was when I was out with my dad one day with my sister and one of my brothers, didn’t really think much of it to be honest with you at that time when you were having them that something was wrong in health wise. 

Until I was 21 years old I had noticed that I would get really bad period pains but nothing happened; it would continue to so throughout the summer of 2012, to which point I had to go to the doctors because it was rather strange at the time and worrying that something wasn’t right. So I went for my appointments and tests; to learn that I had Poloystic Overies Syndrome, were the eggs are bigger than normal that’s the reason why I was getting bad pains. The downside was that I may not be able to have kids in later in life; but I’m not having my hopes up to be honest, also don’t want to think about it too much. I just thought if I can get through being not hearing and having a learning disabilities; I can manage to get through this thing whatever it was, so my doctor gave me contraceptive pill to which I reacted quite badly to. Every 21 days I would have my head down the toilet to which to their surprise; to make me stop taking them and see how I get on without it for a few months, then May 2013 I had implant put in and since then I’ve been perfectly fine. Odd occasions I would get the odd bleeds but I would go straight down to the doctors to ask why it was happening. Other than that I was good to go. 

Between 23/24 years old I had started to become more drawn to myself in away that people were starting to notice that I wasn’t myself; it became more and more apparent as I had started back at work, then becoming signed off work. That’s when I was diagnosed with depression and anxiety; I had the most darkest times then but now that I’m currently not working, I’m starting to feel a bit more well and being able to do things more. However I do have my down days as well but it’s okay I always have great support in the family and friends around me. 

I know get signs for what might be Lacoste Intolerance haven’t been diagnosed with it but due to family members having it; kind of know what it is that’s causing it, so I’ve been voiding as much chocolate even though I love it. Anything with dairy in it because it would send me to a I don’t feel so great mood. Should get it tested out incase it is. Noticed it more between 25/26 years old than any other years. 

If you have any worries that you can’t talk to someone or need an advice on something email on especial account for your enquiries on the topics you have read. 

All the best good luck 



No one tells you about that you really need to know 

Currently bit behind schedule today firstly so noisy where ever I go to try and work; secondly it’s so hot today all you just want to do is sleep and not do anything to be honest with you, but hey at least it’s not raining and get to be able to enjoy the nice weather. 

With this blog post I had to research in what I wanted to write and what the background/content that needed to be written for it. I had a rough guess what it meant but how to begin to start it I didn’t really know what to write about. For me researching and getting ideas help me in life to work out what I want to write. 

Everyone is different, so your life path will never be like anyone else’s. – Throughout school everyone seems to be on the same path but actually when it comes to GCSE’S, colleges, UNI and work people break off in different paths and different directions because they want to focus on themselves and the careers that they want. Also your life changes in different directions every time throughout the years; I’m currently doing that at the moment, looking for a different route to go down.

Some people are just going to be more successful than you. – Some people are always going to be successful than you; but it depends on what you class as being successful at the end of the day, we are equally successful in our own way no matter how much we earn. However people who keen to work on a project that they want to make a success of their life; also enjoy life that love to do everyday, making an impact on people’s lives no matter if they are rich or not.

 If you don’t try drugs, alcohol, sex, or smoking, you’ll never know what they’re like. – You can choose if want to but at the end of the day you can’t say you haven’t tried and preach about it at the same time. I’ve done two of things out of the three; at the end of the day why be serious all the time, do need to live a bit more than serious all the time. 

There are some bad people disguised as good people and waiting to pounce. – There’s two types of people frauders and fake friends; frauders who are faking to be people who say they are to either con you out of things or actually axes murders or some sort. Then you have fake friends who say they care; but at the end of the day they says stuff like horrible about you, to which hurts you the most along side with people who you work with you. 

You will keep falling in love with people that are either not good for you or don’t like you the way you like them. – I have that problem sometimes because I’m too kind and too caring; they just abuse it a lot, along side without realise it at times that I’ve fallen into that trap. It is a viscous cycle at times but you will break the cycle at some point when you find the right one for you. 

You need to be educated, in the book way and the street way. – In the way you have to be educated in my opinion is that teachers and people who campaign tell you their experiences and what they know out there in the real world. However you have to experience yourself if things do happen to you; by not having to live on edge all the time but know what’s around, always on guard as your on the streets to know that your safe and know which places you can call for help if you needed to. 

You don’t need to be famous to have an impact. – To be able to make an impact doesn’t mean you have to be famous to do something so meaningful; believe me I’ve made an impact in so many lives already and I’m only 26 years old, I’m still going to achieve things without being famous in years to come because why stop when you can still carry on doing it. 

Learn something every day – You never stop learning when you leave school, college or uni because you learn things when you at a job or when you move jobs. Even if you went back to studying later in life your still learning something new everyday; I’m always learning something new everyday, you even learn something about the things that you never even thought of trying years ago. Just don’t stop. 

Don’t be afraid. – Don’t be afraid to take risks or leap of faith; if it doesn’t work out then, that’s okay what have you got to loose at the end of the day. I’ve done a few things recently and they all worked out perfectly fine with me; along with a massive gamble but guess what, I’m still here and still doing what I love doing. All you have to do is to believe in yourself and you will succeed and become successful in the things you do. 

Choose to Survive 

Choose to survive is a key thing in life; you either got it or you haven’t, from little amount to a lots we as individuals become as one. One big family to help and support the people who need it the most; this is for our communities that have come together, over the past few months and recently.

Choose To Survive 

The skies are crying as I’m watching the flames come near; every tear that I caught in my hands, I knew this was going to be the end. If there was silence at the end of this monstrosity of a nightmare wish it would end like we hadn’t had a chance of getting out or having our voices being heard, did they have to ignore our cries or our voices. Now there’s nothing left of me here. 

Did you have to take everything that I had in my life? Did you have to break everything that made me who I am? I am a broke glass that you can break so easily? Did you have to tear me up like I was made of paper? You can give it ago by tear me up and put me down because I know my community will help me rise up from the ground like I’m a skyscraper that you cannot destroy. I know we will fight for our rights either I’m died or not; I know we will win, because we chose to survive. 

As the smoke cleared I could hear ringing in my ears; as I came around I could hear sirens coming and going, as I watched you untangle me from shrapnel carefully without causing anymore pain that I’m already in. You just stand there watching as everything unfolds as we lay there bleeding dying; go run run run, back to your silly place of hiding that you call your home and don’t care about us. As we are just lay right here watching you disappear whilst someone else helps us instead; it’s a long way down from here, I think I’m close to the clouds up here.

It’s a race, it’s a race. A race to help the survive. It’s a race it’s a race and they’re going to win. They choose to survive. Yes they are going to win. Whatever it takes they are going to choose to survive. I’m going to give them all my strength with all human race. I’ll be prepared to do anything to help; fight to help survive, I won’t forgive those people’s who did this. Vengeance is mine as I’m going to show that we won’t give in; we choose to shrive, we pull together as one.  

Whatever it takes I’m going to win; you won’t pull ahead, I will light fuse that will make you trip up even more that you have done. It’s a race, it’s a race to find the survivors, we have to win to be able to shrive, not matter what it takes we have to win because we will never loose. When the night falls down they are still waiting for us to return; to return to find them, to which they want to return to their families either dead or alive. We know how much it’s worth for the people of the community; do you know how much it’s worth now?, of course not because you care about yourself.

I don’t know where I’m going but all I know is here we go again; I’m pretty sure where this is going, the empty promises that been made I know the answers already. I have made up my mind; I’m not waisting anymore time, but to go in head first and help. Your so cruel with a device that placed into your hands; your blood is like ice to cold to touch or understand, one look could kill us all in one way or another. 

There’s nothing going to stop us now; as we choose to survive, we are going to win no matter what it takes. Yes we are going to win! 

Vile People

There’s no good in vile people; vile people have the blackest hearts in the world, no good can heal what they have done.

As I woke up with headache in the early hours of Thursday morning but late Wednesday night; I had turned to my phone as I do for a bit of comfort as now I couldn’t sleep with the massive headache, I generally probably reply to my messages even though people maybe asleep. Sometimes I actually get a response from them unexpectedly; not all the time though, it’s just a fluke to be honest with you. 

In today’s society there’s so many vile people out there from ISIS, Government, Trump, May, Johnson is now one (should quit now whilst he’s a head), along with bad step – parents (there are good step-parents as well), friends, colleagues and many more. There is a long list of vile people who disrespects other people because they think that they can. 

Hey guess what you won’t be winning their trust or support or anything like that if you do that to them. I can easily just point out I have had my fair share of vile people; I may of done myself at some point but, at the end of the day I’m not one of those people who want power over people. Killing innocent people every two weeks and not see any progress; not saying any names but I’m going to have to Theresa May and her party. 

Furthermore to this vile human nature that we live in a bypasser yesterday/maybe today where so many lives got taken away; along with the victims who got out alive, who lost their homes. Decide to do the most indecent thing you can ever ask for; taking photos of people who couldn’t get out of the tower block in body bags, thinking it was the best and funny thing to do. That’s how low people can be who have no respect of the living or the dead; then today Theresa May well what can we say, she visited the aftermath but to the fire services and expectations of the building and she never really went to speak to the victims who had survived the burning building. Jeremy Corbyn well he showed sympathy to the victims and the services; not sure if it’s just a publicity stunt or not but he shows better leader skills than May, May really doesn’t care about the people does she. 

If you think of how many people we had lost in the past three months from the first terror attack to the last terror attack; then followed by the tower building fire losing lives about 53 people who have lost their lives from 4 different attacks, the number will be rising from the tower block aftermath as they are still looking for people. It’s sickening that no government cares about us what so ever; if they did what’s stopping them, why aren’t our voices being heard? Why doing something about it after something bad went wrong? Most importantly why is it happening now for the whole government and House of Commons looking into the whole what could of prevented? and what could of stopped it from happening? The answers will most likely to go unsolved; I can guarantee you that we will never know what might of caused it, I just feel sorry for the victims and families who have lost members.

Again we as public pulled together; Muslim and Islam communities broke their fast to come running to there aid, that shows courage for everyone that not every Muslim or Islam are bad people. I do show respect for those people who broke their tradition to help others; I personally would thank them because they must feel like we blaming them for things recently, but all so they want to show people that they are here to respect our laws and rules in the country. 

No matter how long the government will ignore us especially the Conservatives; we will win no matter what they do, say or even think. We will continue to come out on top and reduce the number of deaths as we can; we will fight back with the help of our communities, what’s more they will not separate us or break us.