Whatever you believe this or not it’s up to you. I know the truth that’s all that counts.
I told you when we first met that I had problems but you still loved me know matter what; if you want to help me and be with me take it, because I shouldn’t of said that you should of leave as the amount of times I pushed you away. I tried to hide it. I tried to fake it but I can’t pretend anymore; I only wanted to die alive because of my open wounds have now been opened, knowing that you’ve seen my vulnerability more by the hands of people in my past and I don’t want to hear about the person anymore.
Now that I’ve become who I really am because of you I’m now stronger than I’ve become who I really am; this is the part where I want to say “I want you more than ever” as this is the part where we both know I’m breaking free from my past, because I can’t resist it and can’t go back to it no more. Your better. Deeper inside me with hope and kindness like the highway of goodness.
You always had this little patience with me but I’m still hurting from all of the love that I had lost in the past; I can feel your frustration because all you want to do is stop all of my pain, you just want to hold me close and keep me safe in your arms tonight. Don’t be hard on my emotions because I need time as my heart feel so numb as I’m still healing. Please still have the little patience as I really want to start over again I know that your my salvation because your the one that I can always depend on.
I’m trying to be strong believe me it’s taken it out on me no matter how much anxiety I had to face believe me I’m trying to move on and take control. You know how complicated it is but your the only one that understands me. You can see the amount of scars that have been running so deep; it’s hard to believe that you have been fighting for me, it’s been long for you no matter how painful to see me go through so much and yet still continue to stay put no matter what I chuck at you. You always had that patient for me.
Yet I’m breaking free from all of the pain; finding my confidence once again, making me feeling strong and know when I’m weak. Your my everything as I’ve cried so many tears for you; it’s taken me lot to say but I’ve pushed my pride away to tell you that I love you so much, because what we got is worth fighting for and you are my everything.
(Don’t worry this isn’t a scam all of my information came from a good friend of mine)
Annabel Iron. Let me cast your minds back when I introduced you to her back in July/August 2017. I just wanted to refresh your memory why theses children need your help. At the time Annabel was 11 year old little girl; who looked like a normal little from Nigeria, she is a normal little girl but suffered from “Arrhythmias” yet she didn’t really have much of a life due to this horrible disease that effected her heart. She couldn’t do anything like any other child her age without fallen tired or become very sick. The fact that she was fighting it without any medical care or medication that could help her cope with it.
At the time of her being alive she didn’t have the right equipment or the right medication to be given the have a normal life. Annabel had to continue throughout the night and rely on the hand and foot by the hospital staff and her parents. Knowing that someone like Annabel who is suffering with “Arrhythmias” could pass away at anytime; due to the fact that they don’t have the right equipment and medical attention that they need throughout the day, to which they are missing out on having a normal life and not having to worry about her life wouldn’t be life threatening everyday but also to meet new people and be able to play with friends. However between 31st July – 6th August 2017 Annabel had passed away in her sleep with her family around her. The doctors and nurses tried everything to make her feel comfortable as much as possible but due to lack of equipment and medical care that they didn’t have at the time. Her tiny little 11 year old body couldn’t keep on fighting for much longer.
I have a huge respect for her family, her parents, her doctors and her nurses who have tried everything to help her feel comfortable and help her to be positive about everything. Even with all the odds were stacking up against them all. Trust me I’ve been working with special needs children from the age 21 until present still working with them.
I’ve seen first hand of children like Annabel coming and going with so many medical equipment that they need, medication that they need due to the health conditions. They are lucky in the U.K. that they have good health system that they depend on because you would never know each day to the next what will happen. The day I was told the news of Annabel passing it had truly hit home because I knew what it was like working with someone like Annabel.
All I can say is if you can find your heart to support a child who has a medical condition or a disability in the U.K. or your country; you can branch out a little to get some medical equipment and medication that they need in Nigeria, all I’m asking is to give a little amount that you can give by donating to this link below. That covers everything from the cases you read.
Yay can’t believe the first 5 days of the new year has finally been completed feels like it’s been longer than that but that’s probably because lots of things has happened in the first 5 days of 2018 that you wouldn’t probably expect. In the title I could of been wrong with x amount of days it’s either 364 days or 365 days; do I really care most probably not, because I’m that exhausted that I can’t think or anything. Let me explain my first 5 days of this year had come about.
This year instead of resolutions I started with goals because I know I can go back to them throughout the year; along with two close people who I trust know will help me stick to them as much as I can, if you want to know what they are. Why not check this weeks Wednesday Evening Post (3rd January 2018) as it’s on there.
The first two days weren’t the best start of the new year due to personal reasons along with me not sleeping properly as well. It never starts well for me in the new year I believe but I could be just being sensitive or something I don’t know; I’m just taking each day as it comes than rushing it all the time, I had two successful positives so far already to which is a good start in my book.
I have challenged myself to take control of my life the way I want it; I’ve actually started to save money which is a good start, and along side that I had the best positive news about my hearing where there wasn’t anything wrong with my hearing. The fact that one is weaker than the other one but the dr was confident that I should be fine and don’t need to worry about anything; yet its me being paranoid and anxious over my hearing, yet asked for hearing aid assessment just to be on the safety reasons and double check.
Friday Time Recap Time this opening is an one off special as I haven’t planned it; didn’t really think that I was going to use it for 8 o’clock time but I will today as I have nothing planned, and this was half way completed at the time. So enjoy.
About time to when I should do a Q&A thing really and to be fair I was pretty bored. I wanted to do another blog instead of feeling sorry for myself for being ill and etc haha. So here’s are my answers to the picture up above but will put the numbers next to the answers so that you can refer back to the questions.
A1) Elizabeth Ruth Arrow.
A3) Meg Ann and few others.
A4) Pretty rubbish for a Friday.
A5) not answering.
A6) not sure at the moment.
A7) 5ft4 1/2.
A8) I have so many I don’t know where to begin.
A9) Writing, my phone and probably my bed right now.
A10) when people annoy me to the point of I can’t get out of it, being hurt and feeling rubbish towards myself.
A11) friends who know me well, kids that I work with, knowing that my blogs are okay.
A12) not sure.
A13) Prince Harry always be my secret crush (oops said that out loud), Hugh Grant and many others.
A14) did have five earrings in both ears,
A15) not sure.
A16) not sure.
A17) happy endings.
A18) iPad (haha).
A19) not hundred percent.
A20) this morning.
A21) definitely not.
A22) I can speak and understand none verbal talk.
A23) A few friends.
A24) nope once I’ve watched the series it’s finished don’t go back to it.
A25) your turn to ask me questions for a next Q&A session